Intelligent Design

I’m sure life is out there. We need only look harder. Considering how vast the universe is, we’ve only breached a billionth of a percent of a billionth.

Religious wackos refuse to believe in Alien life because it goes directly against their vanity at being created in God’s image. I can’t take them serious because they subscribe to notions passed word-of-mouth for the better part of 10,000 years. When the story was finally written down, it was written wrong. Then right before it hit official print, a group of people – who thought that God’s universe revolved around THEM – decided to leave out any part of His word they deemed unimportant. The bible is the original Wikipedia with fewer citations. Whatever your religion is, your creation theory is stupid and illogical.

I believe that in God’s multi-verse there must be another species that’s made it out of the primordial soup and sought to reach the sky. So here’s another theory:

I believe in aliens. We were created by aliens and left here.

That is why we constantly look to the sky for our God. It’s genetic memory of something we had and lost, even if we don’t know what it was. We have a natural imperative to worship the sky. Maybe that’s why we spend every day on our knees begging to be let back into heaven, or Eden or whatever you want to call it.

Religion seems to be the universal search for a God, or gods. Those that abandoned us here, they probably left us here because we were fucking pests… We are a failed experiment. We got too damn smart, too damn fast. Like rats out of their cages – or the Flood from Halo – we developed the need  and ability to consume but never developed the ability to control it. Greed is our most natural trait, and it consumes us as we consume everything else – over and over and over. Anonymous said ‘those who don’t study history are doomed to repeat it.” We know this and still manage to repeat it….

Maybe we’re a virus spread out of control. Maybe we’ve been put here in this purgatory to find enlightenment – this could be our Universal Time Out. Maybe we’re here until God figures out a humane way to deal with us. If we behave ourselves, if we get our shit together, maybe God will come back for us one day. If not, he’ll just leave us here abandoned in this dark wing of the galaxy like an experiment in some dark chasm in some archive somewhere. We’re so far from the next possibility of civilization that we’ll either bomb ourselves back into the bronze age or not make it off this blue rock before our star explodes.

Maybe this is God’s plan.


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