Shining Thru

Feeling lonely and forgotten

helpless at a distance

No understanding of how everything is chaos

Spinning helplessly out of control

One more thing is too much and tips the scales

The build up pours forth like a dam that has been released, or broken

Flooding over every inch of your being

Not able to stop, the tears flow and the thoughts spin

Jumping from one to the next to the next

Not able to stop, you wish you had the brake

A pause on life so that you could get your bearing

Figure out where you are and comprehend

But nothing is there to help you regain your balance

A smashing ending to the ride as it crashes and pieces fly

Nothing to grab or lean on

Nothing to comfort and sooth

Alone, Lost, Aching for comfort and understanding

You wobble and step, never in the same direction

Can’t find the answers when nothing will hold still

Can’t hear the answers when you’re too afraid of losing

Worried about everything and nothing

No thoughts to grasp, only spin and spin until they blur

Moving so fast, thoughts you know where there but thought were locked up

Thoughts you never wanted to bring into the light

Explode and show all of their colors

Your dreams, your fears, your life.

When the truth is unknown

When the truth is blurry

Step back and wonder….

Does It Matter?

What’s happening only matters if you care

If you put value on the action

The truth, is only true if you believe it

Perception is your reality,

No matter how skewed it might become.

Truth in the depths of your soul

Can it be ignored…can denial really last?

Can the mind cover up for what the heart feels?

What is the truth?

What you believe or what you see or what you feel?

What is experience other than what you think you experience….

Your perception of the experience creates the reality of the experience

Reality……

Only a matter of perception…

and yet people put so much weight behind it

Every one’s truth is different, but where does it come from?

Does it matter?  Is it important to know the ultimate truth?

Why mess with a reality you’re comfortable in for the plain truth?

Why change realities by allowing your perception to change?

What if things will be better?  What if things will be worse?

What if the truth scares you?

What if you’re reality is denial?

Should you search for the truth when you have already established your reality?

I think we are setting up the younger generation for failure.  I think that we are pushing for all of the wrong things, instead of trying to encourage things like hard work, and good social skills, showing respect, etc…we are trying to tell them to simply be positive…well being positive is great, but not always possible.  What about the child who doesn’t have anything to be positive about, doesn’t have a good family or a good  home life, maybe they are even scared to go home at night, how can you tell that child that they are not being successful in school because they are not positive enough?

I was reading a very interesting article the other day about psychology facts that we have been forced to believe or made to think were true simply because someone said it…one of these myths is about about self confidence.  The article made a great point about how we are teaching kids that they need to work for the wrong things, they need to be self confident, without giving them the tools to do so.  We aren’t teaching them good social skills or how to be successful in school, we are teaching them to be cocky, arrogant, and ignorant at best.  The author simply pointed out that we are connecting the fact that a child has self esteem to the fact that they are successful, when really we should be looking at the fact that the success is making the child self confident.  I would have to fully agree with this point.  What good does it do to tell a child to believe in themselves if we never teach them how to accomplish those goals we tell them to believe in?  It wont do any good for anyone. 

I do believe that a sense of self worth comes from many different aspects of a person’s life.  And having confidence can make things a bit easier for you, at least I think so, but I don’t believe that by simply believing you are the best, you will be…By simply believing that you will land a 3 figure job, you will….By only believing that you will be famous, you will….I think that we are only hurting our younger generation by feeding them these lies.  I think that we should be telling them that life is a struggle and if you want something that’s great, but you’re more likely than not going to have to work hard for it. 

Maybe we should stop trying to make everyone feel so good and simply be honest with them.  Lies aren’t going to help our children when they get out into the real world and experience it without warning.

Perception

Reality

Spinning Round

Never stopping

three stories, one event

three people, never the same

three views, nothing similar.

what truth is in perception

what beliefs are insulted by the other

When one disagrees

Who is in the right?

Who knows what is true?

It doesn’t matter in the end

Perception is the only reality.

Perception, Truth, Reality….

It’s strange when you think about the relationship of these three words.  Your perception of the truth is your reality…it doesn’t really matter what other people see as true, because the truth is different for everyone.  Three people could see the exact same thing happen and yet three different stories will come out of the event…how is this possible?  Who is telling the truth?  How can everyone be honest and yet no one know the truth?  These are all questions that I’m sure police officers have to deal with all of the time. 

Is there such a thing as absolute truth?  If our perception is our reality, and reality is what you live by and how you arrange your life, then does an absolute truth really exist?  And if it does exist, does it matter?  Is it important to know the truth or simply what you believe to be the truth.  Some people can live in denial for weeks, months, or even years about things that they don’t want to admit to themselves is true.  They could have proof right in their hands and still go on believing other wise.  For them, their beliefs are their truth because they can’t handle the thought or don’t want to have to handle the thought of another reality.  They want things to stay as they are, and the only way to keep reality from shifting to is to hold on to that false security… to put up a wall and convince yourself that nothing matters except for what you “know” to be true. 

A person’s mind is a very powerful thing.  I think that there is a lot of truth to the phrase, mind over matter.  A person can convince themselves of just about anything if they really want to, or sometimes need to, just to survive.  Does it matter that we know the truth, or does it matter that we understand our perceptions to the point where our reality will help us to survive?  Does any of it matter beyond what goes on in your own head?

The largest meaning can come from the smallest word, or a simple look, or the slightest change in tone….It’s amazing how much we can read into the words and actions of others, even when, at times there is nothing to read into, it was a simple statement to that person, but to you, it changed your whole perspective. 

It’s crazy how some words hold such value to you, while another person just throws them away or uses them without spare.  How some words knock you down while holding another person up, maybe simply hearing them called that is what causes the conflict…..Words and body language are powerful tools, and deadly weapons, at least deadly in an emotional war. 

Verbal and emotional wars happen all over, all the time, between all sorts of people.  Some of the things people say can really hurt and sting, or smolder until you think you’re going to go crazy if you don’t talk about it…what’s funny is that sometimes they don’t even know that they hold that kind of power.  A person who loves you and who you love and trust can really break you down with a simple word or phrase; or the lack of a phrase or kiss, or a change in body language towards you….It’s amazing how all of these things can mess with the human mind and emotions….

How can we keep our emotions from taking over the logical side when we have to rely on our emotions when dealing with the people that we love.  We don’t necessarily have to know why we love them the way that we do, with such fire and passion, we simply do, because our emotions are so over powering that they can’t be ignored by the logical side of things.  The same way that they can’t be ignored when they have been damaged or knocked down so hard that they are out of breath for the moment. 

I wish we could realize the power that we have on the people around us, the influence that a simple kind word or remembering to call to say hello, give a hug or a smile, or say “I love you” to that one person…..that can mean a lot to someone who loves and trusts you, and/or someone who respects you.

The American Dream….so many raced to get to the “New World” to get a new fresh start for themselves for their family.  People have come from all over the world to be American…and yet we seem to easily forget that fact.  Our country is still very negative and degrading towards “outsiders”…but how can there be outsiders when the only people who were here, Native Americans, when the immigrants came, the immigrants killed most of the population?  If Americans are made up of generations that came from other countries, how is it that as a society we are still very unwelcoming to new immigrants…we still fear those that we do not understand.  People like to say things like, “why can’t they be more American?” and “they’re in our country now and need to act like it” or “they need to go back to their country if they don’t like our traditions.”  All too often these types of phrases are spoken, have people really forgotten, or never realized that the American society is a hodgepodge of cultures, traditions, and languages from all over the world.  The perception is that Americans speak English, but many Americans don’t, and many more throughout the time of the United States did not speak English when they first arrived here.  I am willing to be that many of these people who like to speak out against the immigrants now coming to America, are the grandchildren, or great grandchildren of someone who did not speak English here in America.  Besides that, we do not speak a pure form of English, our language has many words and phrases that have been adopted throughout the generations from countries all over the world.  And yet, people have an issue if they want to keep some of the cultural traditions that their ancestors have practiced for as long as anyone can remember.

Some people are quick to say that people should adopted American cultural traditions when they move here, but what most of those people don’t realize is that a lot of the American heroes and traditions are based on lies.  Because America wanted to declare its independence from England, and it was such a new country, they simply made things up, or stretched the truth enough to give people something to celebrate and create a sense of community and nationalism.  What is wrong with people wanting to live in America, be American, while still hanging on to their heritage?  Nothing, besides the ignorance of those people who can’t see that their own traditions are also based on a heritage, they just happen to be in the majority of people with that same heritage and those same customs and traditions. 

Many people don’t realize that like the immigrants that they are speaking out against, or criticizing because they want to celebrate their heritage as they come to a new country, are probably very similar to what their relatives went through when they first arrived in this country.  I think that we need to realize that there isn’t anything to fear in differences of heritage or culture, instead we should embrace and respect each other’s differences and realize that our diversity is what makes us American.  When we are able to live in peace, with acceptance of our diversity, then and only then will I think that we have accomplished “the American Dream”.

Wandering around,

Pacing Back and Forth,

Lost in thought. 

Forever skipping steps,

Having gaps in logic,

But wanting the end resolved.

Thinking Thinking Thinking,

Sometimes wondering

Sometimes just letting it flow

Random thought taking over.

Chaos growing as you climb deep,

Digging Deeper into the steps of thought.

Climbing in and over

Not knowing if you will slip and fall

Not knowing what lays behind the next

Just continuing forward with everything, yet nothing in sight.

What makes us believe what we hear from certain sources?  Why is it that we take certain information for fact?  Most people hear a word used and never stop to wonder if the word was used correctly or not.  I myself am guilty of this, I hear a new word and remember it in context, never stopping to look up the actual definition of the word.  Habits like these have led to a lot of misinformation in our society.  However, if everyone around you has the same misconceptions, are they still misconceptions?  Or do they become fact at that point?  After all, the purpose of words is to communicate, if communication is achieved, doesn’t that validate the words that were used? 

Although, I think this theory of validity does work with words and the development of language, there are a lot of things that I don’t think it could work with.  For example, history; you can be taught all sorts of misconceptions and probably have been, and you may even choose to still believe those things, but your beliefs don’t make it truth or fact, just simply a misconception.  Your beliefs can’t change cold, hard facts, but they can change your perceptions of those facts, creating your own reality.  A world that only you can decide what the facts are, and what you choose to ignore.

So why then do schools and people in general continue to teach misconceptions of information that have been around and been exposed for years and some for decades?  More importantly, why haven’t we, as a society, learned to question what we’re being taught?

Lightning flashes up in the sky,

So Strong and Powerful

The evening show of truth and beauty

The light of heaven flashes

The majestic peacefulness shows.

Feeling of grandure before you

Fills you with knowledge of something more

Look up and see the flash that comes before the crash.